This is probably the most felt emotion that I have had ever since I moved to the United kingdom with my husband a few months ago.
Back home, folks would probably think that I am crazy.I mean, all I ever do when I call them is complain, complain, complain! I complain about the weather, the cold and distant citizens/ neighbours, the unfriendly faces, the ‘driving on the wrong side of the road’ thing( I have had to literally close my mouth from saying something embarrassing like: ‘you are driving on the wrong side of the road’ when I’m travelling on a bus)….and so forth.
They would think I am crazy because NO ONE comes to the U.K from Nigeria and complain about anything. I mean, back home, people would kill to get a chance to come here. Millions of people in Nigeria think that getting a chance to come to the U.K is moving on to greener pastures; which might as well be true- for them!
As far as I can tell from my experience, it’s not true at all- for me! I don’t see anything especially special about this place at all. I am not trying to be cynical here, but seriously, I just don’t see it. I mean sure, you get to see nice retail outlets, inhale the ubiquitous stench of fresh and stale cigarette smoke( if you’re into that kind of thing), stable electricity, fast Internet….on- time travel schedules( which could be a blessing or a curse- I have experienced both!) and so forth.
So, all these things were stuff that I wish we had back home(except for the second hand smoking). Those were the things I thought would make us all happy people. But, apparently, I thought wrong. I mean these things might be good for the nation’s economy and progression, but it definitely isn’t the harbinger of happiness; not for me at least. I believe happiness is something you have to find and define for yourself. It shouldn’t be what your friends or parents tell you, definitely not what your president tells you; you have to find that for yourself. Be it your faith, your job or the absence a job, your family, friends, whatever.
I had to travel across the ‘waters’ to a land far far away!( I am such a drama queen!), to find my happiness. Seriously now, what I am trying to say here is, I didn’t realise how happy I was living in a country where you had to shop in noisy, rowdy markets, be attacked daily by the ubiquitous stench of sewage waste:), travel in buses that shouldn’t even be fit for chickens, or drive like it’s a freaking James Bond movie because everyone is in such a mad rush ALL THE TIME because believe me, you do NOT want to get stuck in a Lagos traffic jam,or plan to spend 2hours to watch a 3minute funny video on YouTube because the speed of the Internet is absolutely ridiculous,( we are very patient people),or feel a sense of apprehension when you’ve had an uninterrupted 12 hours of electricity- the fallout could be a 3-day black out punishment!
As depressing as this may sound to anyone else, I really miss that place because it’s where my home is, where my family is, and where my happiness is.
Where is yours?